I feel like I have nothing interesting to report, so I haven't exactly felt like writing anything.
Currently, my life consists of:
1. work. It's good because it's keeping me really busy, but on the reverse side it's bad because it's keeping me really busy.
2. cleaning, cooking, etc. You know, wifely duties. I've written about the frustrations I have with these time consuming tasks before, so no need to rehash. I don't have anyone to help with the cleaning because I am, oh, what is the word, a freak? The thought of someone else coming in my house and cleaning kind of bothers me. And what if they let the cats out? Or don't clean in the exact fashion I would if I were home to actually do the cleaning, which I am not? As a result, I mostly bitch about the perceived squalor of the house (which I am assured by D that we do not live in squalor per se, but more of an indifference to mess) and then do nothing. I am told that it is a very attractive character trait.
3. thinking about our upcoming IVF which is approaching faster by the day. Literally.
Current obsessions include, but are not limited to:
a. Should I stop drinking caffeine now and switch to raspberry leaf tea full time?
b.What about acupuncture?
c. Dairy yes or no?
d.Wheat yea or nay?
g.Exercise that is moderate in intensity (which always feels like a waste of time to me. If I'm going to run, I am going to run, not dodder around like I'm afraid of myself).
h. Organic meats and produce consistently?
k. No artificial sweeteners?
l. A trip to Tibet to have my hypothalamic-pituitary-ovarian-axis blessed by the Dali Lama?
The 90 day egg development rule states that with the exception of (l) that yes, I should have stopped or started doing or taking the appropriate measures listed above but have I done any of them? Um, no. In some ways, I really wish I'd never read The Infertility Cure. It made me too hypervigilant about things I could only fully control if I quit working and pursued getting pregnant full time. I'm not so sure that would be a good idea either.
4. The holidays are coming up. I am not feeling sorry for myself that we don't have any children because I am too busy figuring out how to convince family that we need to stop exchanging gifts and donate to a worthy cause of the recipient's choosing in his or her name. Of course, we would still purchase gifts for the kids, but the adults? It seems kind of silly and overblown. We don't really need anything. It feels ridiculous to me to ask for things just for the sake of having something to open on Christmas. With the exception of D, I think I might be the only one who feels this way. We'll see how it goes.
How about you? How do you feel about the holidays and gift giving?